Sunday, June 03, 2007

Sad Childhood Memories

All what we go through throughout our lives affect us in a way or another and form the shape of our personalities and characters.
Our personalities, however, are primarily shaped in our childhood years. This stage creates the core of our personalities and determines the shape they will take. That's why most personality disorders are usually traced to childhood.

A person of unhappy childhood is more likely to develop a character suffering from certain psychological and emotional disorders. The bad experiences and feelings he had as a child keep haunting him all his life, affecting negatively his personal life, career, and relationships. They lie there.. in the very deep unconsciousness... somewhere in the trash heap of memory.. but they can't be deleted.. can't be undone.

No matter how hard one tries to sweep them away, they always come back.. they pop into his life at the very critical moments.. unexpectedly.. taking advantage of his weakness.. of his being fragile... in an attempt to destroy him.. completely...

An unhappy memory is an enemy with which we are doomed to fight everlastingly.
No matter how old one gets, it still has the ability to overcome him.. to control him once he gives up and stops fighting it.. once he surrenders and let it ruin his spirit little by little and throw him in the abyss of misery and despair.
Bad childhood memories can eat you alive!

15 comments:

Mrs. Al Ramahi said...

i totally agree :)i couldnt say a word more on what you said! nice post.. miss your posts! :)

Anonymous said...

" Bad childhood memories can eat you alive!"... so true, and so slow too to prolongue the misery !!
These memories find their way to the surface to haunt us and whether we accept it or not,our life is shaped by them in all its aspects.. I have recently came to accept this fact and live with it..

Anonymous said...

I've got good and sad childhood memories, both are affecting me...and I'm finally admitting it to myself.

ma7joob said...

yes , actully i just wrote about something similar to this , it can take over your life , the only way to stop it is to accept it as a fact and move on , it could be a little word someone said to you as a child , or a small gesture someone did , no matter how small it may sound but it can make a huge diffrence on your life as adult .

Anonymous said...

nice post :>
but how can someone who had sad childhood Memories re-fix those memories?

Diana said...

Thanx Amal :)

Noura, Abed, and Ma7joob: I used to think that there must be some way to get rid of them..entirely. but we have to admit that we can never do that. We have to live with this fact,

Maher: I think that they can't be re-fixed. As I said, they can neither be undone nor deleted from the memory. One should be strong enough not to allow them control him and destroy his life.

Someone in Al Ain said...

i like it so much..

its just a very beautiful post..

Diana said...

Someone in Al Ain: thanks a lot, I'm glad that you like it :)

Anonymous said...

What is there !!!!! why all this posts about sad memories ,difficulties ,the war in nahr elbared , the finishing of the school year ( and this last post is from your point of view only hahaha as kids love it).
SMILE SMILE SMILE
Now i am thinking of the daughter of the daughter of my mother's sister (i donot know the exact word) she is 2.5 years old and she will come back tomorow from suadia arabia I AM WAITING FOR HER so i am so haaaaaaaaaappy and wish for all happiness and peace .

Diana said...

Mr. Rbcs: I'm glad to see you happy. May your happiness spread to us all :D

Unknown said...

Is this true for all of us or for those of us who were born temperamentally sensitive, shy, withdrawn? I wish I could understand. Why do we carry pain with us our whole lives through? More importantly, WHAT are we supposed to do WITH IT?

Anonymous said...

I feel fortunate to have found your blog. I will be 50 tomorrow! In my early 40s, I thought I was fairly happy with my current life. A second marriage, four healthy, good children, a decent job. Yet, one evening, while laying in my bed, a memory came to the surface of my consciousness, a sad feeling overtook me. I was faced with the memory of a solitary childhood. Introverted, afraid of the sound of my own voice in class, I played a detached role.

WHY DID THIS SURFACE? Surely, other people are out there who have similar experiences to mine?

Jeanne

Anonymous said...

I feel for anyone who had a sad childhood... How i cope is just muddle through each day...

Anonymous said...

My older relative made me come to the toilet with him, then said pull down your trousers n close ur eyes all I see is penis when I open his eyes n then I get up, really scared. I was really young maybe 7. He offered me 20p if I stayed but I unlocked the door and ran to my sister. I told my mother and soon enough my sibling found out. My elder brother became extremely protective making my childhood an extremely sad one. I was an anxious child, I blamed myself, I cryed with guilt if I did anything I thought my brother would be unproud of. I used to pray God would forgive me, I wasn't allowed to dress, act, say anything my brother thought was wrong. I was controlled. I would cry with guilt if I did anything wrong or dance or be too showy as a lil kid and my spirits were broken. I became extremely religous to find a peace of mind and purify myself so I don't have to live with the guilt as a child. I have always been scared and anxious around the opposite sex till this day and I'm 21. My childhood and teenage years were just full of regret, guilt and shame. I've never been happy always negative even my family and brother don't respect me even though all I've done was try to make him proud of me. That moment truly ruined my life! A sad childhood has lead to a horrible life with no confidence. I'm now trying to live out my past. I've stopped practising, dressing how I want, trying out drinking and clubbing. Trying to live without fear because I've been ashamed and controlled my whole life and I just want to feel like I can live. I want to feel free and rid from the guilt. If anyone called me a bad name I would panic out of fear, I really cared what everyone thought. I thought all the guys and girls in my culture knew about it I was anxious. Sad. Lonely and ashamed of my very being. I still feel cold and anxious around the boys in my culture because I think they will think bad of me. A bad childhood is the worst thing that can happen to a human being. When you spirits are lost as a child, its very hard to find. Had to release. This is real this is my life.

Ripudaman said...

There isnt any solution to it. You've got to live with it your whole life, till you take your last breath, One may use a mask to fool others but he cannot fool himself.