Scenes (2)

Scene 1
He and his fiancée had just finished their meals. He was thinking about the bill already when he suddenly craved for a dessert. He hesitated for a moment and then asked his fiancée: "hmm, Do you want a dessert or something?" (Please dear God, make her say no, please please).
-"hmm, well.."
-(OMG, is she going to say yes?! I must act quickly) "we can share one you know"
-"Share?! No thanks!"
-"OK good, so you don't want a dessert? I'll order one for myself"
- looking at him in disbelief and anger"Sa7tain!!"

Scene 2
He and his fiancée had just finished their meals.
-"It's time for a dessert, what do you want to have sweetie?"
-"I don't know, what do you suggest?"
-"They have good chocolate cakes here, and I know that you like chocolate cake, what do you think?"
-"OK, let it be chocolate cake then" :)
_"Alright honey"

Scenes from Life (1)

Scene 1
She heard a knock at the door.. she hurried to open it. To her surprise, it was her father who came home unexpectedly. She was stunned, drew back and rushed to her room as if she had just seen a monster.

Scene 2
She heard a knock at the door.. she hurried to open it. To her surprise, it was her father who came home unexpectedly. She got all excited and rushed up to hug and kiss him telling him how glad she was to see him home early. She had so many things to tell him, and they were gonna spend some good time together, as usual...

Our First Anniversary

Exactly a year ago today, we got married. I don't believe it's been a year! As if it was yesterday, despite the many events and changes that took place during this year.
Leaving Lebanon, celebrating our wedding in Jordan, moving to Turkey, then back to Lebanon, then moving to Dubai, and now back to Lebanon... getting pregnant.. and the most important thing my angel's birth...
Sometimes I find it hard to believe that I became a wife, and a mother!
Ammar and Kareem, you're the best thing that has ever happened to me. I'm blessed to have you in my life.

Happy Anniversary my love, I love you :)

Ghorbeh

I am a person who gets very attached to people and places that I suffer a lot when leaving them and find a big difficulty in adapting to new ones.
I've experienced what's called culture shock more than once in my life, and I'm prepared for yet another one that's coming very soon.

The first time was when we moved to another city, leaving my friends, with whom I spent eleven years of my life, back. Despite being in the same country, the change was too much for me to bear. At school, I was surrounded by strangers instead of friends. I felt alienated and heart-broken. I used to call my friends and send them letters telling them how miserable I was without them. I didn't want to study anymore, I hated everything and everyone in my life, my school, my classmates, my teachers, everything. My grades were getting worse and worse. And I was getting more aggressive and depressed. Believe it or not, (I myself can barely believe that) It took me years to get used to my new life.

I visit Jordan once or twice a year, and I do love being there and enjoy it a lot. But it takes me one month only before I start feeling uneasy and homesick and would cry like a baby asking them to "take meeee baaaack hoooome".
The idea of living abroad and leaving Lebanon used to freak me out, and I had a feeling that I was going to leave, sooner or later. And that's what actually happened. When I got married and had to leave I promised myself not to think much about it, to be open-minded and look at the positive side, and do my best to get used to this new life as soon as possible. You know during the first stage, one feels excited, everything about the foreign country and its people seems interesting and fascinating, but later on the suffering and the homesickness begins... the worst phase of all.. when you're overwhelmed with the uncomfortable feeling of not belonging, of being an outsider, which will eventually lead to a feeling of isolation and even a hostility to the new environment. These symptoms, however, are most likely to disappear with the passage of time. I didn't reach the "recovery" and "stability" phase which is the normal outcome of living abroad though because thankfully my unborn baby decided to put an end to my frustration and bring me back home.

What made me write this post is that I noticed that there are people who, just like me, feel like a fish out of water when they move from a familiar environment and enter a strange one, while others can more easily cope with culture shock, make new friends and move on in life.
I have these two friends, one of them left her husband in Spain after three months of getting married and returned back after she could take it no more. While the other has been living in Holland for years and barely complained of being bored, homesick or depressed. People are not the same after all.
I hate el "ghorbeh".

Bad Boys

Children are curious by nature. They like to explore and investigate.. They are fascinated with the world of adults and would badly want to become adults themselves . So, we see the young girl wearing her mom's shoes and the boy trying his father's necktie, and later on she would secretly use her mom's makeup and accessories and he would steal his fathers cigarettes or even his car.

All these are normal things that most teenagers may go through. But what bugs me big time is that when children lose their cuteness and innocence at a very young age and start acting and talking like grownups. I hate to see an eight or ten year old girl wearing high heals and huge earings, dying her hair or even wearing makeup! For God's sake she's still a child and not a teen yet! What's even more disturbing is that when boys start to think about or even be obsessed with matters that are too big and too complicated for their age.

I totally understand that some kids can be aware of sensitive matters like sex at the age of 10 or 12, sometimes after or sadly before that, but what I cannot perceive is the parents' ignorance of their boy's early adolescence and the circumstances that caused it and took the boy to an advanced stage where sex becomes all what occupies his mind and determines his actions.

In my first year as a teacher, I was asked once to take the place of another teacher who had to leave for some reason. It was my first time in grade seven and my last one too. The class was working on some worksheet that their teacher prepared for them, except for one who didn't take his eyes off me from the moment I entered the classroom. I asked him to kindly direct his attention towards his paper instead of wasting his whole time staring at me. After that he started asking me questions every now and then, what's this word, what does this question mean, etc... then he was almost whispering while talking to me so that I get near and closer to him to hear him well. I was explaining something to him when I noticed that he wasn't paying attention to the paper and to what I was saying at all, instead, he was drawing closer to me looking at me in a very strange way. A filthy disgusting look that got on my last nerve. I could barely believe that I was just almost harassed by a seventh grader!

In the same year, a fifth grader used to throw rulers and stuff under the girls desks so that he takes a peek at their legs and underwear. In grade three, there was a boy who was caught more than once drawing pictures for naked women. His parents were contacted and asked to keep a watchful eye on their son, but unfortunately we didn't sense any change in the boy. Last year, we also faced one of those weird exceptional cases where a second grader (seven years old) used to do things that went far beyond anything we could imagine a seven year old boy would do, and used to leave us in utter shock and bewilderment, like bringing porn magazines to school, opening his pants zipper to show the girls "something interesting", utter bad words to them, and tell them that he'd love to do so and so with them, etc... In this case too, the parents were contacted, but in vain. We, the teachers, could no more deal with this boy as a child. To us, he became just like a man whose mind is always occupied with dirty thoughts.

I feel very sorry for such kids. I feel sorry that their innocence and naivety for some reason have been snatched away this early. The kids are not to be blamed though. I blame negligent parents who think that raising kids is only about giving them food and clothing.

Before 18 Tag

I was tagged by Mais to list 6 things one must learn to do and avoid before he turns 18.

The rules for this tag are:

• Post these rules before presenting your list.

• List 6 actions or achievements you think every person should accomplish before turning 18.

• There are no conditions on what can be included on the list.

• At the end of your post, choose 6 people to get tagged and list their names.

• People who are tagged write their own blog entry with their 6 suggestions.

• Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged.

Alright, here we go:

1- Wear funky, trendy, and stylish clothes and accessories. Be fit and attractive.
2- Start to take care of your intellectual, spiritual and religious sides. Be on good terms with yourself, with God, and with the people around you.
3- Unleash your hidden superpowers and creativity. Do crazy and adventurous things as long as you're not hurting anybody including yourself. Read books, learn languages, choose a musical instrument and/or a sport and start learning and practicing it.
4- Think healthy and develop a healthy lifestyle. Do exercises frequently and eat healthy food. You can still enjoy having junk food from time to time.
5- Don't fall in love. Don't engage in a serious relationship. Don't take crucial decisions at this age whatsoever.
6- Start to enhance your life and your personality. Learn from your mistakes. Work on your weak points. Don't be stubborn and remember that you're still not wise enough to ignore your parents' advices. Listen to them, argue with them, but still, don't take things into granted.

and I have to violate one of the rules by not tagging anyone. Almost everybody was tagged already.

Nostalgia

When I was a little girl, I had a yellow teddy bear wearing a red overall..and I used to call him Fofo. I don't know when and how did I get it, what I remember is that Fofo was there all the time. At the age of fourteen, as we decided to move to another city, mama gave Fofo - among other things- away without letting me know. When I discovered about it later, it was too late.

Mom thought that I grew too old to care about an old silly teddy bear. My furious reaction surprised her for she had no idea how dear was Fofo to me and how sad losing him made me feel. It's true that I didn't seem to care much about him and I took his presence for granted, but I was really so attached to and so fond of him. The fact that I didn't realize until I lost him.

It's been many years since this happened but I still remember Fofo and miss him.

How many things in our lives, let alone people, do we take for granted and do not appreciate their real value until we lose them? We may not even notice their existence until they're not there anymore.

Have you ever thought that a day will come when you'll miss a pillow, a pen, a notebook, a mirror, a chair, or even a vase?

Has it ever crossed your mind that one day you'll be longing for a certain place, a road, a shop, a cafe, or even a balcony?

Have I ever imagined that someday I was going to miss the taste of our bread, the smell of Mom's coffee, the flavor of a friend's tea, or even the voice of the grocer and the laugh of the hairdresser?

Did I know before that we get attached to "things" and "places" the way we do to humans?

No, not really! It never occured to me that one day I'll look back at these trivial things with nostalgia, and that they'll become an inseparable part of the concept "home", when they were before nothing but normal things and incidents, a part of our daily routine...

Fairouz becomes not only a serence voice that we enjoy listening to in the morning, and in my case at any time of the day. Fairouz's voice becomes equivalent to "home".. it takes you back to familiar places... and brings to mind familiar faces and sounds... laughs and sobs.. beautiful and bitter memories...it arouses a feeling of "belonging" and takes you temporarily back home.

But as you open your eyes, you find yourself in a completely different place... walking down an unfamiliar street in an unfamiliar city... a stranger... surrounded by strangers....

The cold breeze strokes my hair... brings me back to where I really am... and I wonder, why does it have to be this cold here when back home it is still warm? Why can't I see the beauty of this city the way that others see it? Will I ever feel at home in this place? Will I ever miss anything about it if one day I had to leave the way I miss every corner back home? Why does life, when it decides to be generous with us and offer us a valuable thing, deprive us of many others in return? Why can't we have it all at the same time? Man is a greedy creature, isn't he?

The wind gets more chilly... and rain drops start to fall on me... so I decide to walk back home thinking to myself that we must take advantage of every moment we spend with our beloved ones, and in the places that we love, because one day, when we part with them, we'll regret not showing enough care and love to them, just as it happened with me and Fofo.

Time to Say Goodbye

Despite being well prepared for this moment for so long, and despite waiting for this day impatiently, I couldn't but feel so sad when the time to leave my job finally came.

I wanted to leave as early as possible. I was so tired and badly in need for a rest. I needed to free myself from any duty and just relax and be able to focus on my priorities. But, after all, it wasn't that easy to leave the place where I spent three years of my life, the first place that made me experience the feeling of being productive and independent. It was hard to leave the place as well as the people with whom I spent three years, and with whom I shared lots of good and bad times.

I've learnt a lot there, went through many ups and downs, got to know many people, good people as well as weirdos. Dealing with children wasn't an easy task.. but the experience as a whole wasn't that bad.

So, Diana is no more a teacher, no one calls her miTH from now on :p . I resigned last week. didn't want to wait until the end of the month because I had many things to take care of, including which an extraction surgery for my other wisdom tooth. It's almost healed now, and I can speak again and eat real food after spending a few days eating cerelac.

I still, however, haven't said goodbye. I could barely hide my grief and keep my tears from falling while signing the resignation papers. I rushed outside the school as soon as I was done, promising to come back later to say goodbye before I leave to Jordan in a month or so.

A chapter closed, another one opened. C'est la Vie...

Freedom

I was thinking lately about the concept of freedom. What exactly does freedom mean? When do one usually experience the feeling of being "free"? How often does one feel like stretching his arms out, take a deep breath, and break free ?

Freedom is undoubtedly so valuable. Even children are aware of this fact. That's why they keep struggling against the rules and restrictions their parents and society impose on them. Freedom is so precious that it is worth dying for.

How people perceive freedom varies from one person to another because people think of freedom from where they are in life. To some, freedom means the ability to choose or to do whatever they want. When you graduate, beside feeling excited and proud, a feeling of freedom overwhelms you as well. Graduation is a time to feel free, a time to set off..

To a sick person, freedom takes the shape of recovery. To a man in dept, freedom becomes equivalent to money.
And so, we experience many forms of freedom throughout our lives. Giving birth is freedom. Getting rid of life burdens and troubles is freedom. Even divorce can be perceived as freedom. Achieving goals is freedom. Liberating an occupied country is a supreme and glorious form of freedom. The sweet taste of freedom needs hard work and sacrifice.

Many people spend their lives locked up in their own cages. Some of them tried hard and desperately to break free, but they were too weak to succeed. Others lacked the courage to even try. While others never made an effort to free themselves because they're not even aware of the cage, not aware that they spent their lives as prisoners of their own beliefs, complexes and disorders... prisoners of malice, of injustice, of misery and despair.. slaves of lust and greed...of tyranny and repression..
These can only find their freedom in death. Death is the ultimate form of freedom.

just wondering...

Do difficulties and hard times that we continuously go through weaken us? or make us stronger?

Sad Childhood Memories

All what we go through throughout our lives affect us in a way or another and form the shape of our personalities and characters.

Our personalities, however, are primarily shaped in our childhood years. This stage creates the core of our personalities and determines the shape they will take. That's why most personality disorders are usually traced to childhood.

A person of unhappy childhood is more likely to develop a character suffering from certain psychological and emotional disorders. The bad experiences and feelings he had as a child keep haunting him all his life, affecting negatively his personal life, career, and relationships. They lie there.. in the very deep unconsciousness... somewhere in the trash heap of memory.. but they can't be deleted.. can't be undone.

No matter how hard one tries to sweep them away, they always come back.. they pop into his life at the very critical moments.. unexpectedly.. taking advantage of his weakness.. of his being fragile... in an attempt to destroy him.. completely...

An unhappy memory is an enemy with which we are doomed to fight everlastingly.
No matter how old one gets, it still has the ability to overcome him.. to control him once he gives up and stops fighting it.. once he surrenders and let it ruin his spirit little by little and throw him in the abyss of misery and despair.
Bad childhood memories can eat you alive!

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

Not constantly complaining doesn’t indicate that you have a trouble-free life. Answering “I’m fine” when people ask “what’s the matter” doesn’t mean that you really are. Pretending that it’s no more than a little headache -when they persist- doesn’t necessarily mean that you are saying the truth.

The point is that I try to refrain from bothering people with my concerns, bearing in mind that each one of us already has his share of worries and troubles, and there’s no point of adding to them.

The problem is that some people are not aware of this fact. They think that the only purpose of my existence in this life is to listen to their unbearable whining over and over and over.. to serve them and help them out at any time they want.. not taking into consideration whether I'm ready or not, whether I'm really able to listen/help or not. They just don't care!
I'd rather take care of my own problems, yet I find myself stuck in solving theirs. They mess up their lives, keep on doing stupid things.. and run to you for help, fill your world with nag nag nag until your head explodes. What's worse is that they're too dump to learn from their mistakes, and you are the nice friend/sister/whatever who will never turn them down no matter what they did until the end of time. They keep flooding one's mind with horrible thoughts until you can take it no more and you end up dragged to the abyss of melancholy and despair .. you become the one who needs help.

I'm so unfortunate that I have in my life many people who are too selfish, reckless, and dependent that they can never think of solving their own problems without getting others involved... those while sinking grasp your hand so tight to make you sink with them...

I've always tried to be a good friend, a good listener who's always there to help. BUT I HATE the feeling of being used! I hate it when I discover that some people never really cared about me, they only show up whenever they need something, they only call not to ask about you but to ask you to do them some favor. I realized that I spent or wasted - to be more exact- a good part of my life worrying about others and paying for their mistakes! WHAT THE HELL?!! WHY??!! While no one, absolutely no one deserves a single sacrifice. From now on, I'll work on how to be selfish and careless and mind my own business, I'll learn how to say: "NO", "Leave me alone!", and "It's all your fault, you take care of it!". And not only that, I've decided to cut these annoying people out of my life and I started to apply the decision already. Man, Life looks much brighter without them already! Pheeewww!
We only live once and I want to live a happy life.. the way I want it to be.. not the way they turned it into.
You're miserable? OK Fine! Why make the people around you as miserable as you are and turn their lives into a living hell?!

I'm not posting this to say that I'm a nice caring person, this post is more like a wake-up call..to remind myself of how STUPID I've been.
Oh and I've just noticed that I was whining about whining :D

Untitled Scribble

In it, I read that my people, the Pashtuns, had persecuted and oppressed the Hazaras. The book said that my people had killed the Hazaras, driven them from their hands, burned their homes, and sold their women. The book said part of the reason Pashtuns had oppressed the Hazaras was that Pashtuns were Sunni Muslims, while Hazaras were Shi’a.
[….] The following week, after class, I showed the book to my teacher and pointed to the chapter on the Hazaras. He skimmed through a couple of pages, snickered, handed the book back. “That’s the one thing Shi’a people do well”, he said, picking up his papers, “passing themselves as martyrs.” He wrinkled his nose when he said the word Shi’a, like it was some kind of disease.

As this conflict is currently brought to the surface whether in Iraq or in Lebanon and with the rising Shia-Sunni tension in the Middle East in general, I was stunned to find out that this issue is chasing me even in the books I’m reading. The Kite Runner, seems to be a great book by the way, I’m enjoying it already. Actually Weddo was the one who first recommended it. Thanks Weddo!
I was just talking about this subject a couple of days ago with an Algerian friend who happens to be married to a Lebanese “Shiite”. The conversation touched me as she was expressing her immense anxiety and fear of the impact of what’s happening lately on the future of her kids. She told me that the school where her children study at called her informing her that her son pushed his friend saying: “don’t talk to me you filthy Sunni!” Her husband and she were shocked because they never talk about this Sunni Shia thingie in front of their kids at all.
“Where on earth did you get these ideas from?” The father yelled at the boy.
“but father, Sunnies are filthy. They hate us! We're not supposed to talk to them.” The boy’s reply was.
The parents couldn’t believe their ears. The father explained that this is not true, he wanted to get these poisoned ideas out of his son’s mind “How can you say that? Sunnis are not enemies! Do you know that your own mother is Sunni?”
The boy was taken aback; he did not know this fact.
His mother said: “What? Are you going to stop taking to me as well for being a filthy Sunni?”
The boy felt ashamed of himself and couldn’t answer. This incident left the mother in utter devastation. She was wondering, why can’t they just let us live in peace? Why do they have to impose hatred and violence in our lives, in our homes, on our children?

She was right. I’ve always hated these everlasting conflicts.. discriminations.. battles and wars..between east and west, black and white, Christians and Muslims, Sunnis and Shiites, left and right, atheists and believers, old and new, and and and and.. Can’t humans live in peace, for once? We are all humans after all.

I've always hated this everlasting tendency to kill, torture, burn, destroy. I can't understand how can humans be this evil. 1984 has obviously affected me and put me in a state of bewilderment.

"If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face--for ever."

The Triumph of Love

I stopped at this event with amazement. US marine who was terribly burned in a suicide bomb attack in Iraq came back home and married his sweetheart . Their love and devotion is unbelievable. She married him despite his horrific burns. They called it The Triumph of Love. They say that they see love with their heart and not with their eyes. This reminds me of " beauty and the beast"... Beauty lies not upon the face, but within the heart...I'm speechless.. really.
Their story

Reflections on Marriage

The parents meeting is one of the many occasions that prompts me to contemplate about life in general and marital life in specific. Meeting parents from different places, of different looks, tastes, and attitudes is an interesting experience that makes me think, analyze, and come up with certain impressions and concepts regarding marriage and man-woman relationships.

The appearance of each couple tells to some extent whether they make a happy family or not, whether they match or not, the nature of their relationship and its effect on their children; to the extent that we find answers to many questions that hover around the behavior of some children that is directly and undoubtedly related to the family atmosphere. At many instances we came to a conclusion that with parents like these, how can the child be blamed?

The issue that I'm going to tackle here, however, is not the effect of unsuccessful marriages on children. I'm going to talk about one of the causes of a failed marriage and vanished love.

Among the couples who came to meet us, I can tell that in most cases the men looked prettier and younger than their wives. We wondered how a man like this can accept a wife like that, they just looked odd together. Most of the wives are fat and old fashioned which tells that they don't give themselves any kind of care, and like typical wives, their main concern is focused on their house, children and husband, leaving their beauty, personality, confidence and even femininity to fade away...

Their husbands on the other hand, looked pretty and elegant, well dressed for "the occasion?", obviously prepared for the mission of searching for beauty that they can no more see any trace of in their houses. Hmm, can they be blamed?
Some of them were not really listening to what the teachers had to say about their children, they were only nodding their heads pretending to be concentrating on the speech while their imprudent eyes were concentrating on somewhere else, examining the teacher from top to toe until she finds herself obliged to avoid them and direct her talk to the wives who seemed to be the only ones who cared and who attended the meeting for the real purpose of it.

"Marriage is more complicated than I thought it was" I thought. "What if I became like one of these women after a few years?!". The mere thought of it freaked me out! "NO WAY , there's no way I'm going to neglect myself like that!! There's no way I'm going to engulf myself with the household and then I get fat and ugly, and my husband starts gazing at beautiful ladies, and he may even think of remarrying!! :" :P. And my stream of thoughts goes on before it gets interrupted by the arrival of a new couple.

"Now that is the family that I'm going to have!" I thought to myself whenever I saw a cute happy couple towards whom the looks of admiration were directed. She's the wife who does not put aside the fact that her rule in this life is not restricted within cleaning and cooking, and is well aware of the other things that she needs to pay attention to in order to not leave a space for her husband to lose interest in her and look for his satisfaction else where. And he is the husband who's proud of having a smart, educated, up-to-date and appealing wife. (Knowing that some kind of mean men who can't resist but gaze or even cheat no matter how beautiful and great his wife is!)

We have to admit, even though good looking is not the only thing to admire in a wife, but it is a very important factor to have and take care of. Believe me, it can cause the family to fall apart! It's the man's right to have a wife of at least moderate beauty who takes care of herself if not for her sake then for the sake of her husband, instead of totally neglecting herself and turns into a complete disaster a couple of years after marriage; and then starts lamenting her fate when she finds out that her hubby is having an affair with another woman. It's an inseparable part of the wife's rule in taking care of the family and the husband and work for their satisfaction is to have more time in front of the mirror. Knowing that the husband must take into consideration that his wife has other priorities to take care of and consequently he should not be very demanding.

Moderation after all is the best choice.

Types of "friends"

• those who remember your existence only when they need you. At other times you are totally being ignored.
  
• those who make your personal life the talk of the town.
• those who envy you and end up hating your guts.
  
• those who hate you for being honest and to the point, they don't want their wrong doings to be pointed out.
• those who let you down from the first misunderstanding.
  
• those who hurt you and expect you to get over it, as if nothing had happened.
• and those who change friends like they change shoes, they leave you once they find new company to hang out with.

sorry about the title, these people were never friends, and will never be...

Don't think twice...

…When it comes to marriage!

Two women came to ask about Zahra, my cute little naughty pupil, during the break yesterday. Zahra was called upon, and as soon as one of the two women caught sight of her, she ran to embrace her, started kissing and hugging her passionately.

I asked: who’s she?
The answer was: her mother.

me: Her mother?
a teacher:Yes, her mother is divorced, so she comes every while and then to see Zahra who lives with her father and stepmother.

The little girl seemed to be a bit shy and embarrassed, as if the woman who was holding her was a stranger! The mother put her daughter in her lap, gave her a bag of candies and chocolate, talked for a while, then kissed her goodbye...

Zahra walked back to the playground. On her way she noticed that I was watching, she looked at me, smiled, and went on. Nothing at that moment was able to hide the bitterness Zahra felt inside, not even her joy with the bag of candies her mother brought her.

I couldn’t stop my tears from falling. The scene touched me deep. I felt sorry, for both daughter and mother. A woman, having her kids away from her, living with another woman- a stranger- that’s hell!!!!!

I pondered for a while, what if (God forbids) the same happened to me one day. I’d prefer to die than leaving my kids to another woman. I won’t care for the husband then as much as I will do for my kids, hell with him if he turned out to be a bad man. The kids are what matter!
It was yesterday, and only yesterday that I understood why do women stand and tolerate leading a miserable life with their mean husbands. It’s for the sake of their kids!

It is not as simple as it appears for single people. It’s not only you who is involved, it’s not only your life that is going to be destroyed or influenced by the consequences of divorce. There are innocent victims who are going to pay and suffer because of unsuccessful marriages.


So people, when it comes to marriage, do not think twice, think a hundred times before getting involved with the wrong person!


note: I wrote this in December,6th, 2005.